Mystery Girl's Diaries

Before coming to the point... Today I saw an old man trying to pay through his mobile..seeing old people trying to adapt themselves to the technology is kind of amusing...he just made me smile. Okay!! coming to CYCLES... Recently I watched a sadhguru's video...I love watching his videos... So in that video, he was talking about cycles...he said that the whole universe is based on the cycles...and by the end of the video I was just amazed like that makes so much sense... We, humans, go through the same things again and again...the thing is we get to experience and we learn how to handle situations as we pass through the cycles... He was telling that planets revolve in cycles, women go through monthly cycles, etc, etc...and that was the fact... We go through things and decide that we never going to experience that again at some point we cross that limit without knowing and we get back to normal situations. We go through things, we get hurt, we realize we accept, we move on, we learn....

 Do you ever feel exhausted...I don't usually think like that but... these days have been a little too much for me, I am just feeling like, I used all my energy, I just feel completely drained ... I am just feeling exhausted emotionally and mentally. I feel exhausted trying to understand everyone but still not being understood by others and now I don't even expect to be understood by others. I just need one constant person in my life, who understands me, without feeling like a burden. I am not even able to put what I am thinking and feeling right now. This is that time when people feel like they need a break from their life. the sad part is that at least I am able to write it here, where some people don't even know what they are going through and they don't even dare to share with others, coz you know the reason people judge, people make fun, I just hope people make this kinda conversations normal. I know I don't stay in the same mood for a long time, but this feeli...

 we all figure it out in the end..isn't it? we face things we never thought we would, but we do survive, we thought we can't live without that people, but we do live, we face, we fight, we accept and we move on in the end, isn't it the process of living, isn't it the way we survive our everyday lives?. when they said  "change is the only constant" this is what they meant. change is the only way to live, we have to change and adapt ourselves according to the situations and when we can't things like depression, anxiety, and stress happen, coz we live in a human body with a brain that has so many emotions in it-that little part cannot handle the things the way we want, it takes time, we have to make that time easy for it to understand and move on. and in the end not matter who and how much they love you or promised you...YOU WILL BE LEFT ALONE. and maybe more than anyone, during that time you will need yourself more than anyone. don't let yourself fool yo...

Finally, I am in love... With myself. (sorry, not sorry) These past few days from a month have not been easy as I mentioned earlier, there was a phase of realization between those days. After all that, I just fell in love with myself again. I am in love with the way I think, I am in love with the way I perceive things. I am just loving this me, it's not that I didn't love myself all these days, I did but I feel myself changing, the way I am reacting and accepting things is pretty impressive. this post has been in drafts for the past few days (i wrote it on the 6th). and realized so much can happen within 3 days...  3 days before I thought I was ready to accept and receive love in all forms and I thought I know what I wanted... but NO!... I am still scared of love and relationships and commitments. I don't know what I am in need of. but at least I know what I don't want. I don't want to give someone hope without even knowing what I want for myself and at this point, ...

Not only books but even good series are hard to find and some series hit hard...maybe I watched this series at the correct time...this series was really interesting, I showed how complicated can relationships get, the friendship, the love, it was really beautiful to watch. and thanks to the friend who reminded me to watch. Here are some beautiful dialogues that hit me, "Expectations make it difficult to figure out what you wanna be because whether it's something you thought you'd be doing or someone you thought you know".  "The difference between what you expected and what actually happens can make  You look at the future in a very different way". "I am far from perfect and a long long way from knowing everything but I do know enough to want to be the very best parts of the people I love best, I only hope someday I will be." "BEST FRIENDS MUST TELL EACH OTHER IF there is stuck something in their teeth or on face" "no one knows what t...