One thing I realized about myself is that I only write when I'm in pain or when I'm sad or lonely or maybe when I'm just lost in thoughts...
So for context, my mother has 4 siblings 2 brothers older than her and 2 younger than her, and 2nd old bother is the one who passed away.
It was sudden, it was unexpected, like...no one could have imagined even he could have never imagined I guess, I'm still in disbelief that he passed away it's almost coming to be one month.
His death made me question "Inthe na..life ante??" Is that all? what is life?
He was there and suddenly he vanished, no one... no single person was ready to accept his death, I mean how can anyone disappear like that.
We mourned. we tried to accept it, more than anything we were trying to come out of that shock because, as I said no one had ever expected it, He had spoken to my father on a video call just an hour before it happened., He went to the gym in the morning, came home for a tea break as usual, then went back to his shop... And then… something happened. He suddenly collapsed. And he never got up again.
That was it.
I was in the hospital all that night I know with one of my friend's connections, I heard what the doctor had to say, "There’s no change. The risk of death is 100%.". But I was human, after all. Even as a healthcare professional, I couldn’t believe it. I hoped. But then... this is life.
I remember that last moment in the ICU. They said he was stable. His blood pressure was back to normal. They already had him on ventilator support. And then, in the next minute, they started CPR. He was already on a pacemaker. They had already done CPR three times that night. And when I heard them say it again in the morning...I knew. Everything shattered. (there was not even a proper diagnosis, lets say cardiac arrest)
I know life is unpredictable, life is harsh, life is this and that but I never thought it would be this bad.
He was a good person he helped so many people he has gained so much name.
But I don't know if his ending was fair and meaningful, He shouldn’t have died like that. He was always full of energy, always driven to do something new, something unique. He was the one who kept our maternal family connected.
For my mother, losing him was like losing a father all over again.
It was painful. It is painful. And it will always be painful whenever we remember him. I don’t think we’ll ever truly get used to his absence.
But this loss made me learn that no matter what life throws you at, you have to live, you can never predict anyyythingg in life.
- Mystery girl
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