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Leaving things

Today I am not just happy, I am proud of myself..ask me why.

Okay, let me tell this whole story...maybe where I am is that age where asking for money from your parents doesn't just feel right.

Obviously, I was desperate to find a job, kind of part-time but...but that career that chose doesn't allow me to do so, the only thing that was able to do was work as a duty doctor, which does require some level of clinical knowledge, which I don't have... I had to learn work, with the help of one of my friends, we found a hospital, it was not bad but not too good, they did allow us to touch patients and learn some things practically... but...

That place doesn't seem right to me from the beginning, that vibe was different which is not my kind and ofcourse behaviour of some known people was not tolerable kind of irritating and of course college and this thing was kind of hard to handle without my interest...

well, people said it's hard to find a hospital again..try to adjust, maybe I can adjust but as I said I was not completely into it and somewhere those people and that vibe were restricted by my self-respect to reach me...it might look like ego but I can't lower my standards or my self-respect just because someone is teaching me something. I am happy that I gave myself a chance and it's okay that it turned out into something that I didn't love.

after all these things and after hearing every kind of person's opinion... I am just proud of myself...coz I did the thing that felt right for me...before entered into this thing people motivated me and discouraged me, still, I tried and the same happened when I decided to leave, again I did what I felt like doing....

what I realized today is...not only entering or choosing things is hard in the beginning, but also getting out of something is hard too, and leaving something is hard too...

I don't like to do things if I am not able to give my 100% it's better to stay away from those kinds of things. and yeah I just fell in love with myself again, what a personality I am. even if I regret it later, I am loving this right now. I just feel things differently and a little too hard right?!


                                                                                                                                   -Mystery girl


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