I have been hurt. I have cried. I have felt like an idiot for trusting people. I have had my lessons. But I still have not become heartless. I still believe in the magic of vibes. So if I like you as a person, if I feel that vibe, then I will still trust you. I will still not think twice if my soul feels happy vibing with your soul. I may tell you things in our first conversation that I won't tell even a person I know for years. So, I still keep that mad, innocent part of me alive. I know it's risky. But I would like to take that risk and keep a window open for magic. Earlier, the problem was that once I trusted a person, I kept that trust on blindly. I used to be so sure in my head that I won't be betrayed that I could not even see the screaming evidence. I used to ignore every sign, every clue. And I used to accept all excuses, all fake promises, just because I trusted that person. And that has hurt me a lot in my life. Me not giving up on people who have proved that they don't deserve me has been my biggest mistake.
But now, I have changed that. I have become too sensitive to betrayal. Even a hint of it, and I will leave. I don't take any bullshit anymore. I am so brutal and arrogant about this that some people don't like me anymore. But I like this version of me. I still trust you, even after so many scars, so many lessons. But I won't give you a second chance. This is your first and last chance. If you mess this up, no matter what's your excuse, you are dead for me. I won't look back. I won't listen to your sorry, sob story. I won't take you back, no, never. So I have kept this balance of an innocent heart but with a working brain. My heart will open itself if I feel the vibe. But my brain will shut the door once you have hurt me beyond trust. So now, only those people stay who deserves to stay. My one decision once does not hold me hostage for life. I keep the power to throw you out. I keep my happiness above everything. I keep my peace my priority. So, how I treat you depends on you. You give me honesty, and I will give you all I have. You play games with me, and you are dead to me.
~ @rkupclose
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