Depression

 https://youtu.be/pCXZKv8tmTQ 

okay this video made me think of "my" phase, which I never talked about, maybe I was scared of that thing , maybe I was trying to avoid that thing/hiding it within me. 

now the time has come, I have to say yes I went through this thing called "DEPRESSION". the first thing i never share it with any single person becaz i don't think they take mental illness just like physical illness they will consider it as madness and again they start judging you and more over they bring this thing again and again in your life no matter how happy you are (i mean they keep reminding you). 

coming to "my phase" i don't think i have a single reason for its cause. there are so many factors that influenced me, from my academic stress to family situations, i felt so much pressure on me. suddenly there was so much sadness in my life and i wasn't able to handle it. i used to cry like an idiot, i felt helpless... i never felt like that someone could understand me ,even if they do they don't have a solution for this coz the problem is in me and finally i tried to tell them, they didn't beleive me and as i said they never understand you easily, ofcourse they don't because they are not in your place. tired to avoid it, they said its not even a thing, but i wanted to consult a psychologist but i found a psychiatrist he never listend to me all i wanted is a therapist.he only wrote some medicines, i took almost a 2 weeks break from everything slept like anything becoz of that medicines and i don't wanted to continue that tablet therapy, i left it in the middle, i don't say i healed or cured myself but maybe i did.

 i decided to focus on good things.

i decided to not think about anyone who doesn't think about me.

i decided to not think about anything that doesn't matters or deals with my life.

i decided not to compare anything which is mine.

i decided letting go of things which were bothering me /holding me back.

whatever, that phase made me think differently, i am not a completely changed person or different person, i just earnt to see things little differently, definitely my thought process has changed.

and the most important thing i learnt was most of the time the problem and solution for siutaions is only "you", don't expect or blame other's for your situation. be responsible for your life coz no one cares.

and finally when some person around you seem depressed please cheer them up, make them feel better, don't make them hear you problem, that the wort thing you ever do,my friends they used to do like encouraged to be depressed, they used to tell things like "yeah i feel" same, everyone around us are happy we are here for nothing blah blah. i request you to not do that ever. and deal it normally just like head ache it is something maybe its not easy as head ache but its an illness too ,not madness.( i can write more ,but some other day!)

                                                                                                                            -Mystery girl